(There is also a page that has a list of unchosen band slogans that can only be accessed from this page.)

Some of the names below are clickable to explanations of their origins.

Here are some explanations of origin of several of these band name ideas.

(Hit BACK on your browser to get back to your place on the names list.)

POLIO HORSE is kinda like "polo pony," only more rude.

MR. LEETH was the asst. band director and director of the jazz band at East Central High. He rode a motorcycle. He had an undeniable influence on all of The Robertsons. I mean, how cool is it go to some smoky hotel bar and see one of your teachers playing bass in a rock 'n' roll band and wearing a leather Harley-Davidson cap?

COWBOY CURTIS was a character on Pee Wee's Playhouse played by Lawrence Fishburne.

LUIS LANE. Obviously a reference to Superman's piece, Lois Lane. A play on my name and Lane Pianta's, who auditioned for us a while back. He's not a mathematician.

MARI AND THE STEALERS. This girl from high school who had a job in a jewelry store at the mall until she stole jewelry.

ALBERT AND THE RANGE. Remember Bruce Hornsby and the Range? Albert was a friend who went to high school with us. He got cancer during his junior year and his hair fell out due to chemotherapy. We were actually going to call it "Albert and the Mange," but he died.

JULES VENOM was hit upon during one of those marathon make-me-laugh-fests at Jim's on Blanco where we'd sit until dawn trying to stay awake long enough to become exhausted from laughing. We were trying to guess what Mandy's middle initial, V., stood for. Victim? Vagina? Vampire? Victory? Vengeance? Venison? Valleygirl? Venom? (Hey, I'll bet you can't guess it either!) Then we tried to come up with stage-names for us. Mercury Cougar, Mike Atoms, etc. I found Jules and Venom to be exquisitely dissimilar.

SIDESHOW BOB. A "The Simpsons" reference. Don't need to say it twice, "The Simpsons" is the funniest thing on TV.

THE HOMERS. A "The Simpsons" reference. Don't need to say it twice, "The Simpsons" is the...D'oh!

UNCLE JESSIE. Choose your hallmark of American television: "The Dukes of Hazzard" or "Full House."

THE GHOST TRACKS. One of those urban legends, this one from San Antonio. It seems that, decades ago, a school bus full of children got stuck crossing the railroad tracks at this south San Antonio crossing. Tragedy ensued when it was hit by a train and the children were killed. Now, if you park on the tracks, stop your car's engine and put it in neutral, the ghosts of these children will push you uphill through the crossing. When you get to the other side of the tracks, you will be able to find the hand and fingerprints of the children on your car. I've actually tried it with some friends late one night. Believe me or not, it did work. Not the fingerprints, though. I'm sure it's some sort of optical illusion that makes it seem like you're going uphill when, in actuality, you're on a descending grade. But that area of town is spooky, so that adds to the effect.

SUPERDEAD. We were thinking of powers we would have if we were superheroes. Mandy said he would have the power to be superdead.

THE REALLY LIARS. Another Mandyism that everyone who knows us quotes frequently. If you are explaining something to Mandy and he doesn't believe you, he'll say, "Really, liar?" It's akin to his, "I'll have to take your word for it and call you a liar."

THE RICH GUYS. Mandy, again. "Rich" is the word we use to respond to someone who has anything we don't. Example 1: "The girl I met at that party called me last night." Response: "Riiich!" Example 2: "I got a speeding ticket on the way over here." Response: "Riiich!"

POREEF is from the classic Kids in the Hall skits about that canned meatish substance that's worse than SPAM.

MR. MOUTH. Remember that weird kid's game where that plastic head would spin around while you tried to shoot marbles into its mouth? Fuh-reaky!

THE SALADO B-BAND was the Salado Middle School band for kids who weren't good enough to wear the red vests of the Salado A-Band.

THE LAMONTS. The son half of TV's "Sanford and Son." Classic line: "Lamont, you dummy!" That's comedy.

THE ROBERT KENOS. Robert Keno was a star basketball player at East Central, though he was always in the shadow of Tony Terrell who was even better. Just liked the sound of it.

PETER PARKER. Before you go for the obvious and think of Spiderman's street-clothed persona, remember who you're dealin' with here. I'll use it in a sentence: "That guy looks like a peter-parker." Think about it.

DJORK. OK, this one is obvious, but it's so fitting. World's cutest freak.

DONKEYBOY. There was this guy who we used to see at a lot of our gigs and also at some of our favorite haunts. He always greeted us, but we could never remember his name. He looked quite a bit like that bad influence character from Disney's Pinochio, the one that got him to smoke.

DANCING PANTS. One time, I woke up in the middle of the night and was startled to see this dark figure looming near my bed. It was only my pants hanging over the back of a chair. Still half asleep, I spoke the words, "Hi, my pants." Years later, Chuck was looking through a Dr. Suess book when he found a drawing of some creature waving to a pair of pants walking past it in the woods.

WEEZY was George's wife on "The Jeffersons." Her name was Louise and Weezy was his nickname for her. It was also one of Mandy's nicknames for me, along with Bitch, Slut, Woman, Lube-job, Sasquatch, Yeti, Grimace, Crimson Tide and countless others.

THE JAMBIS. Jambi was the genie on Pee Wee's Playhouse.

T-HE. No, it's not pronounced "tee-hee". This is from "Dumb and Dumber" when Jim Carey's character was attempting to read a newspaper article and got stuck on the word "the". He pronounced it "tuh-heh". I loved that line!

BIG WOOLY MAMMOTH CAT. Once again, thanks to Mandy. He and Chuck were each arguing that the other had the hairiest, well..."girl-part". What I gathered from their verbal intercourse was that, apparently, Mandy has a "wooly carpet", but Chuck has a "big wooly mammoth cat!"

DR. QUINNER. TV's "Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman." At East Central, ever the bastion of sharp wit, to "quinn" somebody was to fool or "dis" them. There was even a physical display that went along with "quinning" someone: You would wave and call their name and, as they turned around, you would turn your head away from them and, at the same time, turn your hand around to show the back of it. It was optional at this point to say, "Eh, quinn!"

THE MARTHA QUINNERS. I am old enough to remember seeing the very first broadcast of MTV. Ah, Martha Quinn. At East Central, someone who was easily "quinnable" was said to be a "diert". Someone spray-painted a large circle with the word "DIERT" in it in the middle of the intersection where the school police officer, Ranger Rick, stood to direct bus traffic in the afternoons.

LARGE PORNO BOYS. We were watching some foreign music video by this euro-tramp. According to the english subtitles, she likes large porno boys.

PATTY STAB. If it's morbid, it's gotta be Mandy! His take on the child's game Patty-Cake.

DR. HFUHRUHURR is Steve Martin's character in "The Man With Two Brains." A recurring theme throughout the film has the doctor explaining that his name is "...spelled just like it sounds." I also love that brunette Barbie doll mounted on his car's dashboard. He says it is a "statue" of his dead wife.

HAMMY MY BOY is the greeting Mandy gives to our friend James. I think it is a corruption of the spanish version of James, "Jaime".

JOHNNY SANTOS was one of those guys in school who you avoided at all costs. If ever anything was missing, it was a good bet he stole it. We think he has Chuck's bike.

THE CANDY BANDITS. No one ever grows up in Never-Never Land. This incident took place around Christmas of 1996. Mandy and I were watching Michelle Solberg play at Hole In The Wall in Austin. As we were leaving the show and on our way back to the truck, we decided to go into a nearby parking garage on the UT campus to get a Coke for Mandy. They had a snack machine also and I decided to get a munch. I soon discovered that the glass was missing from the front of the machine. I was wearing my coat with several large pockets so Mandy and I filled them up with "free" snacks and candy. We made a hasty retreat to the getaway car and got away. A couple of blocks down the Drag we realized we had left most of the good candy behind. We drove back, parked nearby, and went in to liberate more candy...two more times! We came back to the apartment and laid our loot out across the table. We then took photos of each other standing proudly with our booty.

AMERICAN STANDARD. A very popular brand of toilets found in public restrooms.

THE LITTLE GENERALS. "The Little General" is the moniker given by sports reporters to Avery Johnson, the point guard for the NBA's San Antonio Spurs. Since David Robinson was in the Navy, he is known as "The Admiral". I guess they wanted to stick with a military motif. Little General is also a euphemism for the penis. Look on the bright side, Avery; you could have been the Limp Lieutenant, the Stubby Sergeant, the Premature Private, or the Miniature Major.

NO-GOOD RODRIGUEZ. Leonard Rodriguez is the owner of Texas Music, the place we buy most all of our equipment. Whenever he calls to inquire about a payment, he says, "This is no-good Leonard Rodriguez." He's an excellent guitar player and has a wonderful singing voice, but he also has the most frightening laugh I've ever heard in my life. It's also disturbing to watch.

THE MADAME HURLEYS. As some of you know (and for some reason find quite amusing), neither Mandy nor I speak Spanish. However, we each took two years of French in high school. Madame Hurley was the young, mousey French Teacher. She refused to speak to her students in French and pretended she didn't understand you if you spoke to her in anything but French. She told us to see some French films on our own to help us learn about the culture. One day, a student told her in front of the class that he had seen "Last Tango In Paris." The look on her face was classic when he spoke of the scene in which, "He put butter in her butt." I never could decide whether or not I found her attractive.

THE WONDERFUL FLYING ASSES. The only one on the list that Mandy meant to be a band name.